BREAKING NEWS: Local Cat Digs Hole, Applies for Job at Plant Hire Company

In a stunning display of ambition and questionable career choices, a domestic shorthair named Charlie has shocked locals by digging a sizeable hole in the garden and promptly uploading his “work” to a plant hire website.

According to eyewitnesses (mostly the neighbours and one very confused squirrel), Charlie began his excavation early Monday morning, pausing only for snacks and several dramatic glares at passing birds.

“We thought he was just chasing a worm,” said Margaret Jenkins, 72, who lives next door. “Next thing we know, there’s a two-foot crater and a tabby sitting proudly next to it like he’s applying for a job on a construction site.”

The situation escalated when Charlie’s owner, Dave, discovered that his furry roommate had somehow used his iPad to upload a photo of the hole to Digs ‘n’ Rigs, a plant hire and construction site marketplace. The caption?

“Skilled digger. Competitive rates. Payment in Dreamies.”

Site moderators were baffled.
“We usually get contractors or landscapers,” said Dave Thompson, site admin. “This is the first time someone with paws and a total disregard for OSHA standards has submitted an application.”

Charlie has since received three job offers, one sponsorship deal from a brand of kitty-sized hi-vis vests, and an invitation to appear on DIY SOS: Animal Edition.

When asked for comment, Charlie simply rolled over, yawned, and attempted to eat the corner of the newspaper.